Do you know who your friends are?

There’s that one saying:
Le sort fait les parents, la choix fait les amis   -Jacques Delille

It means fate chooses our family, we choose our friends.

Well, what if your so called chosen family isn’t what he/she says they are? I mean the whole friendship thing is supposed to be easy. You’re supposed to know them. Care about them. Love them as they are your own family. In this modern world of ours, we no longer see friends as family; we just see them as people we know.

So what ever happened to “a friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud.” ?? Now it’s all “keep your friends close, enemies closer.” It’s like you don’t even know who you’re true friends are anymore.

I would say i have many friends. Correction. I have a lot of friends. Not just here, but in other places countries all over the world. Friends in this context would be: people i know. How about friends: chosen family? I could honestly say, it’s as small as the number of people that could fit into a van. I classify them by how we interact with each other and how we know each other. These wonderful friends of mine, whom i can proudly say “My chosen family”, are one of the best thing that has ever happened to me. These are the people who I can say “I know them” and mean it. I could honestly say they’re my chosen family because i know them. I know:

• Their tone of voice. I could just listen and tell who the person is
• Their different laughs
• The way they walk, or for some, strut :)
• The way their faces change when they lie
• The different smiles they have
• The different facial expressions they often use
• The way they communicate with other people
• The way they handle different situations
• When they’re hiding something
• Their eating habits
• Their view on love (love as in friends, food, family, pets etc)
• And most of all I know them for who they truly are

Even though not all of them fit into this category, my chosen family ticks most of the points above. They’re the people who i want to share my whole life with –till death do us part.

For those other friends, i still like them, but not as i love my chosen family. The “people i know” friends; they are the ones who we know, but not the ones we often pay attention to. They are the ones who have a secret life behind the mask they wear. They are the ones who won’t tell us what is happening in their life. Their the ones who won’t let go of their fear of being close to others. These are the people who, I'm afraid to say, i don’t know them; not as well as my “family”.  If these people would just step it up a notch, god knows how many true friends they would have.

I guess my point here is that most of the people aren’t what they say they are; even your friends. So  if you have spare time in your hands, think again; Do you know who your friends are? Re-evaluate your friendship; are they what they say the are? If you have a friend who won’t tell you anything about them, think again; do you want them to be your friend? even if it’s just “friend: people you know”?

 

So long,

ARJanuarisya <3